A Himigimi for the Ouji
by SaiyanMad
Summary: A Dare: Bulma has to sleep with Veggie before 1 month!!! R&R!!! VEGETA GETS A MAJOR SHOCK!!!!
1. Default Chapter

Heya, it's been a long while, ne? I took a major break from writing cos I had lots of yukky exams and stuff, anyway, back 2 writing now!!!! I replaced the last chapter cos something went weird with the paragraphing, so sozzo!  
  
A Himigimi for the Ouji  
  
By SaiyanMad  
  
Prologue  
  
"So anyway, Bulma, Vegeta goes 'OH yes, this Dragon Ball was a present from your dome headed little pal and that gorgeous female he's with,' and yesterday we were talking. well I was talking and trying to make a conversation but Veggie no Ouji only started listening when I mention that you and Yamcha were out celebrating 10 years of going out, and he sort of fell over and blew up our house, by accident of course, and my mum came back from shopping and told him off and he ran off REAL fast," said Gohan, all in one breath.  
  
"Wow. I didn't think VEG-head thought of anything except his own sexy ass," smirked Yamcha.  
  
"Well, he is kinda cute," mused Bulma.  
  
"Yeah, but you thought ZARBON was cute until he turned into a monster!" exclaimed Krillin.  
  
"Yeah. but." blushed Bulma.  
  
Vegeta burst in from the next room, where he'd been scoffing food with Goku.  
  
"I would be grateful if you didn't talk about me behind my back, especially by a little runt with a weird haircut, a scar face (A/N: no offence meant to people with scars on their faces!!) with a weirder haircut who still thinks he's the world's strongest and that stupid woman who thinks she's oh so clever and pretty and seductive but can't even boil an egg!!! Saiyan elites," he paused for effect, " do not love (A/N: picture Veggie saying that in that husky voice of his. Doesn't it send shivers down your spine?) and we do not bond. The elite who does is a disgrace to his men!"  
  
"Wow, Bulma, I didn't know monkey-butt could actually deign to talk to us!! What an honour!" drawled Yamcha.  
  
Vegeta looked around, and suddenly, without warning, blasted out of the open window and away.  
  
Krillin suddenly burst out laughing.  
  
"What is it short guy?" asked Yamcha.  
  
"You know what would be REALLY funny, Bulma," he chuckled.  
  
"No. what?" Bulma queried. "If you got Vegeta to fall in love with you."  
  
"Hey!" interjected Yamcha.  
  
"That would be kind of funny," mused Bulma.  
  
"OK, Bulma, I dare you to fuck Vegeta!"  
  
"I bet I will do it in one month!!"  
  
"Done! Two hundred zenii says you wont" jeered Krillin.  
  
"OK. Deal!"  
  
Bulma sauntered out the door.  
  
"Hey Bulma, have you forgotten something???" Yamcha yelled out the door. "Like I'm your BOYfr." he trailed off as it was obvious Bulma wasn't listening, as she had jumped into her capsule plane and flown away. 


	2. Simply Seduction?

Chapter 1 - Seduction?  
  
Bulma skipped into her bedroom and dived into her cupboards.  
  
"OK, first thing I need to decide is occasion, then colour, then item of clothing!" she chuckled. "And I think we'll go for 'typical playgirl', in the red, and a top and trousers."  
  
She tapped the words into her computer file (think like the one on I Clueless /I) and came out with two results, both in wardrobe no. 5.  
  
She searched through wardrobe no. 5 and finally found 2 outfits that fitted the criteria. A red shirt and close-fitting jeans, and very low-cut strappy top and cropped black trousers both seemed to work.  
  
"Hmm." she murmured, as she sashayed across the room in the latter number, "I think I'll go for the strappy top. shows off the curves more."  
  
However much Bulma might refuse to admit it, she knew she wasn't really all that pretty, so she always went for bright, vibrant colours that set off her hair and pale skin.  
  
"Hair. damsel in distress looks good today, I think. NOT!" she giggled.  
  
She gathered her short hair into a high ponytail, leaving some strands down to frame her face, and added big silver hoops and a long necklace, trailing down into her cleavage. She sprayed on her favourite perfume, a little- known brand called 'Princesse' and added some silver eye shadow, lip gloss and LOTS of mascara.  
  
"Perfect!" she said as she twirled around the room. "Princess Bulma, here you c-"  
  
***CRASH***  
  
She broke off as the door was pushed off its hinges.  
  
Standing in the doorway was an angry, hungry, hunky Saiyan prince.  
  
"WOMAN! Where is my meal?" he demanded as he glared at her, ignoring her physical appearance completely.  
  
"VEGETA!!! What the fuck do you think you're doing, barging into my room? I could have been naked! Get out!!!"  
  
Vegeta snorted. "You, naked! There's nothing to see there, a hag like you could never make anyone interested in mating with you! And I'm not leaving until I get a MEAL!"  
  
"Sorry Veggie-baby, I'm not cooking tonight. I'm going out clubbing, so unless you starve or cook your own meal, you're going to have to come with me!"  
  
"Clubbing!!! I thought you said violence wasn't done in your 'humane Earth society'! I really must see this!!! I will enjoy pummelling some of your inane Earthlings into the ground."  
  
Bulma bit her lip as she suppressed a grin. No way was she going to jinx this!!! Veggie was going to go clubbing with her, and if he didn't fall for her beauty then, he would soon. That barb about her looks had gone in hard, and this time, it was personal.  
  
OOOH!!!! So Veggie is going clubbing with Bulma, little realising that this kind of clubbing doesn't use big pieces of wood. R&R, and the next chap. will come out soon!!! Also, check out my other stories, which are better than this one, they've got more humour in 'em. Tata for now!!! ~*SM*~ 


	3. Club for your life!

**Club for your life!!! **by SaiyanMad

Bulma looked him over critically.

"Veggie, I think you're gonna have to change out of you spandex training gear.  You don't wear that for clubbing, you have to wear an –um -_special_ kind of clothing.  Yeah that's right!!!  You have to wear plain black trousers and any coloured shirt."

"Funny customs you humans have," Vegeta grumbled.

"Let me see what clothes you have," said Bulma, "I've done it before so I know what people wear."

"Fine, if you must," Vegeta muttered.

***

She searched through his only closet.  He didn't have many clothes, only one pair of black leather trousers with studs all over them (A/N: !!!!!) and a deep red shirt with laced up front instead of buttons.

"OK," Bulma said, "you can wear these.  Just DON'T muck them up!"

She giggled slightly, bending over and squeezing her breasts together so her cleavage sort of… expanded.

"Let's go, Veg-head!"

"Wait a minute!" expostulated Vegeta. "What weapons are we going to use?  I thought we needed… clubs… to go clubbing!!!"

"Uh… well nowadays it's a lot more modern… so you use these."  Bulma handed him a mobile phone.  "What you do is, you hold it up to your ear, say something into it and the area around you explodes, killing lots of people…"

"Hn.  Sounds good to me!!!" smirked Vegeta.  "What weapon will you have?"

"Oh… um…" said Bulma, flustered.  She dug around in her bag.  "This fake lipstick tube shoots deadly beams.  I better not get it mixed up with my other real one though…. heh heh…"

"Right.  Give me a minute to change."

***

They pulled up outside the club in Bulma's red convertible.

"Do they always have big lights and stuff like this?" asked Vegeta.

"Uh… yes.  You see, it's a kind of… theme.  Everybody pretends that they are at a party for about the first hour and then the lights suddenly go down and the fighting begins."

*Oh Lord* she thought *Just what am I getting myself into?  Veg-head is gonna KILL me! *

"Hn.  You earthlings have some strange traditions.  That 'birthday' one… I never could understand that one either."

"Oh forget it, Veg!!!  Let's dance while we still can!"

***

Bulma was exhausted.  Loads of guys had asked her to dance, and when she wasn't dancing with a partner she forced Vegeta to dance with her… once.  Never again.  It was a bit like dancing with a mixture of a big rock and a thunderstorm… basically, impossible.

"Wo-man…" Vegeta groaned. "When is the bashing starting?"

"Uh… soon…" Bulma murmured, feeling worse by the minute. "Oh my God!!!  That guy just nicked your phone… I mean, weapon!"

"Hah."  Vegeta swung round, hit the guy on the head and grabbed his 'weapon'.  "Let's say I've given the clubbing a 'kick-start'." he grinned.

"Why… you…" One of the guy's friends ran over.  "How dare you do that to my friend?  Ooh I'm gonna get you!"

He swung a punch at Vegeta but it didn't land anywhere near the target.  With a contemptuous flick of his wrist, Vegeta sent the man crashing into the other wall.

"Hey… look… what's going on… oh my God… Vegeta and Bulma… HOW DID YOU GET HIM TO GO PARTYING WITH YOU???"

"What???" screeched Vegeta.

"What!!!" shrieked Bulma. "Yamcha you imbecile… oh shit… Veg figured it out…"

"WO-MAN…" Boy was Vegeta looking angry.  "YOU MEAN TO SAY THAT YOU DRAGGED ME TO THIS PLACE TO _DANCE???_  NOT TO CLUB PATHETIC HUMANS???  You made me come to a place that that IDIOT frequents???  THE HUMILIATION!!!"

Vegeta was advancing slowly on Bulma who was retreating with small whimpers of fear.

Yamcha swallowed loudly.  "OK… I know I am going to regret this…"

"Now look here Vegeta!"  He stepped in front of Bulma.  "You… you can't…"

Vegeta growled.

"Uh… never mind!" Yamcha squeaked.  He ran off, out of the club.

"Uh…" Bulma whimpered.  "I… need to go to the bathroom… be back in a minute!"

She scampered off.  *Phew, that was a close one. *  She pulled out her lipstick and started applying it. *I wonder if… *

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

She turned.  The last thing she saw was Vegeta, in a ladies' washroom, grabbing for her lipstick.  Then he landed on top of her, and she blacked out.


	4. Veggie gets a shock

Vegeta was shocked.  VERY shocked.  

*Hn.* he snorted.  *Those pathetic weakling earthlings can't even have someone land on top of them without fainting!  Now, what should I do with her… if her father finds out, I'm going to get chucked out of the house, but I ought to get her to some kind of doctor.  I better go ask Kakarrot's mate… *

He took off with Bulma in his arms, giving the death-beam lipstick a wide berth as he did so.  It only took a matter of minutes to get to the rural area that contained the house of Kakarrot, his mate and his brat.

He banged hard on the door, cracking it down the middle in the process.  He pushed the two pieces to one side and walked past a startled Gohan pressing some buttons on a little white box with a black screen.

He mounted the stairs, slung Bulma over his left shoulder and walked in, unprepared for what he saw.  Which was Goku and Chichi in the middle of rather an enjoyable clinch, with most of their clothing strewn across the floor.

"Eeeeeeeeeeaarrrgh!!!!!!"  Vegeta screeched, and dumping his precious load unceremoniously on the ground, he made a run for it; only to be grabbed by a naked Goku while a topless Chichi examined Bulma for signs of life.

"WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING???"  Vegeta shrieked.  "YOUR SON IS JUST DOWNSTAIRS!!!"

Goku looked slightly embarrassed.  "Um… Vegeta, it is… normal…  What's the matter with Bulma, anyway?"

Now it was Vegeta's turn to blush.  "I… uh… landed on top of her and she fainted."

Chichi gasped, and then chuckled.  "Well, Vegeta, it sounds like you've been on top of her quite a lot!!!  It sounds to me as if Bulma's pregnant!"

***

OOOHHHHH cliffy!!!  I bet Veg will be annoyed, Bulma's pregnant with someone's baby… could it be YAMCHA'S??????????  Anyway, sorry the chapter was so short but I have exams next week and I'm supposed to be revising… GCSEs are hell!!!  Anyway see you on the next chapter in a week or two, remember to READ AND REVIEW!!!!


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